───● The Energetic College Girl Holds Back ●○●
“Hello! I’ve heard a bit about you from Koumi~ Nice to meet you!”
…Huh?
I feel like I’ve heard this voice somewhere before…
I’d heard about him from Koumi, but the young man standing before me was incredibly handsome.
About 175cm tall. Not muscular, but not overly thin either.
He wore a loose-fitting white t-shirt, with a leather-type necklace that served as a subtle but nice accent.
His gentle smile conveyed that he held absolutely no ill will towards me.
“…Mizuho?”
(…Whoops, no, no. He’s the one Koumi likes, and I have my own fated person I’ve set my heart on…!)
I was thinking that I could see why Koumi would fall for him when she called out to me worriedly.
How unlike me! I have to return his greeting properly.
“O-Oh! My apologies! So you are Masato-san! My lady Koumi has told me much about you!”
“Ah, uh, she has?”
Oh yes, in great detail.
Lately, Koumi’s gushing stories about him have become a regular event among our friends.
I was sure she was seeing him through heavily rose-tinted glasses, but maybe that wasn’t the case.
As we talked, the young man in front of me was constantly smiling. And that, in turn, made Koumi smile, too.
It was truly, dazzlingly bright.
(Koumi’s so lucky. If I can find my fated person, I wonder if I can be like this, too…?)
I haven’t even been able to see him again yet.
But he was such a kind person, so it’s okay for me to dream a little, right?
While Koumi was in the classroom getting what she forgot.
I remembered that I hadn’t asked him for a favor yet, so I turned to face Masato-kun.
I have to tell him this! You never know where you might find a hint!
“The truth is… I need your help, Masato-kun, in finding my fated partner!!”
“Whaat!?”
Masato-kun’s eyes widened in surprise. He’s so expressive.
“The thing is, I can’t go into the details… but I have a fated person. And that person is likely… a first-year at this university!!”
“O-Oh, is that so…?”
“And so, I would be most grateful if you, as a fellow man, would assist me in finding him!!”
There might be a guy network or something, after all…
“S-Sure, but what’s his name?”
“I don’t know!”
“You don’t know!?”
When I made a big ‘X’ with my arms, Masato-kun recoiled dramatically. His reactions are so fun, I can’t help but smile.
“Uh, then at least his major, or some defining feature…”
“I don’t know his major either! In fact, while I believe he’s a first-year here, I can’t even be sure of that!”
“The conditions are too tough!?”
I know it’s a strange request to make. But I can’t give up!
“But his hair was slicked back, and his height was… about the same as yours, Masato-kun, I think…?”
“Hmm… a slicked-back hairstyle is definitely rare.”
Right, if he wears his hair slicked back all the time, I feel like we could find him relatively quickly!
I haven’t seen many guys with slicked-back hair on campus!
“Please use your boy-network, Masato-kun… let me know if you find him!”
“I mean, I’d be happy to help, but…”
Masato-kun made a difficult face.
Was it too pushy to ask him for something like this out of the blue…?
Thinking that, I glanced at his face. He had an awkward expression and was scratching his cheek.
“I… don’t have any friends.”
The words that came out were unexpected.
“What!”
Masato-kun gave a shy, bitter smile. This handsome guy, it’s not fair that even that gesture looks good on him!
“So, would it be okay if I just… let you know if I happen to see someone like that?”
“You’re so serious!! Thank you! I am most grateful for your cooperation!”
Come to think of it, Koumi did mention that Masato-kun enrolled late and didn’t have many friends… I feel bad for asking…
As we were talking, Koumi came running back.
“Sorry, thanks~! Well, shall we go?”
“Hoi, welcome back~”
“Koumi! I’ve enlisted Masato-kun to help me find my fated person!!”
“Oh~ that’s great! Masato, did you think of anyone?”
“No, I can’t say I have.”
With Koumi and Masato-kun, I started walking towards the station. I have a feeling my university life is going to be a lot of fun from now on!
It’s about a ten-minute walk from the university to the nearest station.
A short time like ten minutes passed in a flash as the three of us walked and talked.
“Well then, my train is this way~! See you later!”
“Okay! See you tomorrow!”
“See ya~!”
By coincidence, Masato-kun and I were on the same train line, while Koumi was going in a different direction.
We saw Koumi off to her ticket gate, and then Masato-kun and I headed for a different one.
Right, since it’s just the two of us now, I should ask him what I’m curious about~.
“So, what’s the deal with you and Koumi, really~?”
“Eh? Hmm~ it’s not anything you need to be suspicious about. We’re friends, just friends.”
“Ehh~ are you sure~?”
I nudged Masato-kun’s side with my elbow.
If I can get even a little reaction out of him, I think Koumi might have a chance…
“What can I say, Koumi is just really kind. She was so nice to me when I didn’t have any friends… honestly, I’m grateful to her. So I guess, more than anything, I just don’t want to betray that.”
“…”
Serious. Masato-kun is dead serious.
Hmm, it seems like he hasn’t noticed her feelings yet…? Good luck, Koumi…
“Koumi was always telling me what a good person you are, Mizuho-chan. You two are close, aren’t you?”
“What! So Koumi does do some good work from time to time! That’s right! I am a good person!”
“Haha. You’re gonna say it yourself!?”
Talking with Masato-kun is so comfortable, so fun.
Maybe that’s why.
I might have let my guard down. When I saw the two people walking towards us… a chill ran down my spine.
“…? Mizuho-chan?”
I instinctively tried to hide behind Masato-kun… but it seemed I was too late.
“…Hmm?”
The pair in front of us… were the senpais from my badminton club, the guy I confessed to, Keito-san, and his good friend, a third-year named Satsuki-senpai.
Please don’t notice me… I thought, but as we passed by, our eyes met.
“I knew it. What’s-her-name, Tonosaki…? Mizuho, was it?”
“…”
This is the worst.
Of all the times to run into them…
“Ah, the first-year who confessed to Keito?”
“Yeah, yeah! Satsuki, you told me to be nice to the first-years, and now a delusional girl has been born because of it.”
“Hey, is that my fault?”
…I want to get out of here.
I pushed on Masato-kun’s back and whispered, “Let’s go.”
“Hey, wait a minute.”
But he wouldn’t let me.
“What? You confessed to me, and now you’ve already moved on? Nice~ quick on your feet. Do ugly girls have to flirt with guys just to stay alive?”
“Keito, that’s a bit much…”
I can’t see his face, but I can tell from his voice. It’s a tone of clear mockery. He’s probably smirking at me right now.
I didn’t even want to look.
“Hey, the guy you like is talking to you, why don’t you look over here?”
This is horrible.
The fact that Masato-kun is seeing this. I thought we were just starting to get along, and now he’ll be completely disillusioned with me…
The day of the confession I don’t even want to remember.
The words he said flash back in my mind. No.
I don’t want to cry pathetically again—
“I’m an outsider, and I don’t really know what happened, but,”
Sometime, somehow, Masato-kun was standing between me and the senpais.
“There’s just one thing I do know, so could you take that back?”
“Who the hell are you?”
“Me? I’m Mizuho’s friend.”
“I thought so, no way he’s her boyfriend. Dating an ugly girl like this.”
“That’s it.”
I can’t see his face.
But I can tell his voice is sharp, even without looking.
“She’s not ugly. Mizuho-chan is cute, isn’t she?”
“…Huh? That’s what you’re focused on?”
“I don’t really get the details. I’ve only heard about it secondhand. But if there’s one thing you said that I can say is definitively wrong, it’s that this girl isn’t ugly. Not on the inside, not on the outside. She’s a kind-hearted, wonderful girl.”
…
“H-Huh? Do you even get it? Just a few days ago, this girl confessed to me. In other words, I’m the one in the superior position. For you to—”
“Superior? What do you mean by that? The person who gets confessed to is superior to the one who confesses?”
“Well, yeah, obviously. The one who is liked is always—”
“That’s the most delusional thing I’ve ever heard. It’s disgusting. I can’t stand your attitude towards a girl who gathered her courage and confessed to you.”
“…! You…!”
Keito-san started walking towards Masato-kun.
…I have to stop them.
And yet.
Why is my heart pounding so loud?
Why is my face so hot?
From behind Masato-kun, I grabbed a handful of his shirt.
“Then I guess you could date her, huh? I wouldn’t date an ugly girl like this, but you could.”
“I don’t want to talk about her in the same breath as you, who clearly only sees her as a tool to validate your own self-worth, without any regard for her own feelings.”
“…You’re an idiot. You’ve got a decent face, too… forget it. This is boring. Satsuki, what are you spacing out for, let’s go.”
…
The senpais left.
All that remained was me, and Masato-kun.
“Ah… sorry, Mizuho-chan. I probably made it harder for you to go to your club… I shouldn’t do things like this without thinking…”
“…”
It doesn’t matter. It was already hard for me to go to the badminton club. More than that, I feel awful for getting Masato-kun involved.
But even more than that.
“I thought it was probably a bad idea for me to stick my nose in when I don’t even know the whole story… but I couldn’t help it. I’m sorry.”
“…”
Stop. Stop it.
You’re too… kind.
Because. I have someone I’ve set my heart on, and this person in front of me is the one Koumi likes.
“Ah, want something to drink? I’ve been wanting to try the new drink at that cafe. I’ll treat you, as an apology.”
His awkward smile pierces my heart in a way I can’t explain. I can’t stop my heart from pounding.
Ah, I’m so jealous.
Koumi can say out loud that she likes this person.
A deep breath.
It’s not enough to calm the racing in my chest, but it helps a little.
Come on, me, I whisper to myself.
“Thanks, Masato-kun! Man! You saw me at my most embarrassing! That’s right! I confessed to that guy and got shot down! And I mean, he turned me down hard, it was so embarrassing! If I’d known he was that kind of person, I never would have confessed—”
In that moment, a hand was placed on my shoulder.
“You don’t have to force yourself.”
“Eh…?”
“You don’t have to force yourself. When things are tough, it’s okay to say they’re tough. I… I’ve only just met you a few hours ago, Mizuho-chan, but I can tell you’re trying to act cheerful. But you don’t have to force yourself when you’re hurting. No one could hear something like that and not be hurt.”
“…”
“I’ll go buy you that new drink from the cafe! So just wait here for a bit. In the meantime, you can try to sort things out. I’ll listen to whatever you have to say. So, don’t force yourself.”
With that, Masato-kun walked off towards the cafe.
His back grew smaller and smaller, until it was out of sight.
All I could do was crouch down and press a hand to my chest.
“It hurts…”
Tears spilled from my eyes.
But the reason for these tears is surely different from last time.
Was I always this easy…?
Why? That voice, that figure, they echo in my chest and won’t go away.
I know the name of this feeling welling up inside me. But if I put it into words, it’s not allowed.
—Because I have a fated person.
—Because he’s the one Koumi likes.
“I have to hold back… I have to…!”
The guilt I feel towards Koumi.
The feelings I have for Masato-kun.
And the memory of my fated person.
All of my many emotions mix together and become tears.
Spilling down my cheeks.
—Ah.
Love… is so damn complicated.
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