───● The Tsundere OL Ponders ●○●
I recall hearing the phrase “December is so busy even a master would run” back when I was a student. I didn’t fully grasp the meaning of the word back then, but now that I’m a working adult, I feel like I finally understand.
“Mochizuki-san, can I ask you to handle this?”
“Yes. I’ll have it done by the end of the day.”
“Sorry to dump it on you~ Thanks!”
December—especially now that we’re approaching the very end of it—is incredibly busy.
Overtime is a given; I can scarcely remember the last time I left work on time recently. We technically have ‘No Overtime Days,’ and usually they live up to the name, but when this time of year rolls around, it’s as if everyone forgets they even exist. No one even breathes the words.
Setting the documents I’d just received on my desk, I stretched my arms high above my head to loosen up my stiff body. Glancing at the wall clock, I realized we were already a bit past the start of our lunch break.
“Seira, good work today~”
“Miki-san, good work.”
The person who called out to me, finally freed from my morning workload, was my senior coworker, Miki-san.
“It’s seriously getting so annoying, right? All this endless overtime.”
“It really is…” I agreed.
Heaving a deep sigh, Miki-san handed me a canned coffee she had apparently bought as a treat. “Here you go,” she said. As always, she was a kind, capable senior colleague. …Well, outside of the bar, at least.
“Thank you,” I said, accepting the drink. I had just taken a sip when Miki-san spoke up again.
“…You know, Seira, you’ve really calmed down.”
“Oh, have I?”
“Yeah. You used to be, like, super on edge all the time, but that’s completely gone now.”
On edge… Yeah, I suppose she was right.
Before I met Masato, I felt like my life didn’t even matter. And conversely, right after I met him and started frequenting the bar, so much was going on that I genuinely didn’t have any emotional bandwidth to spare.
Now that I’ve properly conveyed my feelings to Masato, I suppose I finally have enough peace of mind to focus on my work.
“I suppose it’s because Masato and I started dating…” I mused aloud.
“Stop with the delusions, alright~?”
“How can you be so sure it’s a delusion? I mean, it is, but still.”
Ah, how wonderful it would be if I could actually date Masato… I would earn money purely for his sake… Wait, I guess I’m already doing that now.
I took another sip of my coffee. The bittersweet flavor permeated my sleep-deprived brain.
“Well, I’m glad. You don’t have that dangerous vibe about you anymore,” Miki-san noted.
“I apologize for the trouble I caused back then.”
“It just goes to show, boys’ bars really do save the world!”
I would hate to live in a world like that… I thought, but unable to outright deny it, I simply offered a wry smile.
“Well then, let’s do our best to make it to Friday this week, too.”
“Right.”
With our conversation wrapping up, I plugged my smartphone cable into the PC in front of me. Since it was my break time, I decided to eat lunch while indulging in my recent obsession: transferring the photos I’d taken on my phone over to my computer.
“…Seira, what exactly are you doing?” Miki-san asked.
“Since they absolutely refuse to release a Masato photo book no matter how long I wait, I’ve decided to just make one myself.”
“Ah, so you’ve moved over to the production side…”
I mean, are you even allowed to do that on your work PC? Miki-san’s exasperated voice faded into the background. Humming happily to myself, I continued my work in eager anticipation of Friday.
When Friday finally arrived, I managed to keep my overtime to an absolute minimum so I could come and spend some fun, quality time with Masato.
After all, the college girls had crashed my visit last time, so we didn’t get to spend much time just the two of us.
Come to think of it, I’ve gotten quite used to coming to Festa. To think I was completely intimidated by its flashy exterior and unique atmosphere at first.
Now, on the contrary, I pull open this door with a sense of pure excitement.
“Masato, I’m here.”
“Seira-san! Welcome!”
Masato was stationed at the reception desk today, so I had him serve me directly.
Lately, Miki-san, our other colleagues, and I have been coming here separately. Everyone finishes work at different times, after all.
“Sorry I haven’t been able to come straight over lately. Work’s been incredibly busy,” I told him.
“…No, not at all! Please don’t worry about it.”
Walking ahead of me, Masato seemed a little off. He was acting somewhat distant, or perhaps… aloof?
Feeling a twinge of unease, I let him guide me toward the back of the establishment, settling down onto a sofa seat.
He’s been seating me in this semi-private booth a lot lately. It feels like I’m getting regular-customer treatment, which makes me incredibly happy.
After showing me to my seat, Masato went into the back to fetch my drink. He soon returned with a bottle of alcohol… however.
“…Huh? Didn’t I have a bottle kept here?”
“…Ah! I’m so sorry! You’re right!”
Panicking, Masato scrambled back to the staff room. Since I come to the club so often, I keep a bottle of my own liquor here, but it seemed he had brought me something else entirely.
As I watched Masato hurry away, that sense of incongruity returned.
Yeah, something is definitely off with Masato today…?
Waiting amidst the noisy chatter of the club, I fiddled with my smartphone until a flustered Masato finally returned.
“I’m so sorry for the wait, Seira-san…! Whoa—?!”
Perhaps he was in too much of a rush after his mistake, but this time Masato tripped, nearly dropping the bottle he’d brought. I immediately shot out a hand, catching Masato before he could fall, and snatched the bottle out of the air while I was at it. My phone clattered to the floor, but I couldn’t care less about that right now.
Thank goodness. I might not look it, but I actually have pretty good reflexes.
“I-I-I’m so sorry, Seira-san!”
“It’s fine. Just take a deep breath and calm down, Masato.”
Thinking things would go completely off the rails at this rate, I placed the bottle on the table and pulled a pale-faced Masato down to sit beside me.
Then, I retrieved my fallen phone.
“What’s wrong, Masato? You seem really antsy,” I asked.
“N-No…”
Even as he denied it, he couldn’t hide his unusually distant demeanor.
…Hmm. What should I do here?
Regardless, I decided to first have a drink of the liquor Masato had brought. I had ordered a drink for Masato too, of course, so we clinked our glasses together in a toast.
Thinking that he might return to normal if we chatted for a bit, I decided to just enjoy the evening as I usually would, but…
“And then Miki-san went out of her way to— Wait, Masato, are you even listening?”
“Eh? Yes! I’m listening!”
In the end, Masato just wouldn’t revert to his usual self no matter how long we talked. Letting out an exasperated sigh, I made my move.
I wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him tightly against me.
“Uwah?! Seira-san?!”
Masato’s handsome face was right in front of mine. My heart soared at the proximity. Trying my best to suppress my surging emotions, I spoke.
“Masato… Do you really have something you can’t tell me?”
“U-Um, that’s not exactly it…”
I’m so glad I’d been drinking. I can only pull off bold moves like this when I have some alcohol in my system.
Pulling my body even closer to his, I whispered.
“I worked so hard this past week just so I could come see you… so if you’re spacing out on me… it makes me a little sad, you know.”
“…I’m sorry.”
“Nuh-uh, don’t apologize. I just want you to talk to me if something’s bothering you.”
I came here looking forward to spending time with him, so it hurt when he acted so distant. There wasn’t a single lie in those feelings.
“Well… To be honest… um, and this goes for you as well, Seira-san, but I’ve been thinking that my current situation… isn’t a very good one.”
“Situation?”
Perhaps embarrassed, Masato scratched his cheek with his index finger. Even that small gesture was incredibly endearing.
“Well… Seira-san, you, um… you think quite highly of me, right?”
“I love you, you know?”
“Guh… Isn’t that a little too direct…?”
“I’m just being completely honest about my feelings.”
I love Masato. I don’t need anything but him. I work solely for his sake. There is nothing wrong with that, and I have zero intention of hiding it. I literally only live for this boy… Okay, maybe that last part is a bit too heavy.
“…Um, anyway, I couldn’t help but wonder if it’s wrong for me to just… not take any kind of action in response.”
“Didn’t I tell you? I’m completely fine with just being put on hold.”
“Well, yes, you did tell me that before, but…”
Masato pressed his lips together, his expression turning entirely serious.
“I just started thinking… that taking advantage of your kindness like that… probably isn’t the right thing to do.”
…Masato is such an earnest boy. It’s a miracle he even works at a place like this. But that’s exactly what makes him so wonderful. It’s what makes him so cute.
To Masato, this probably wasn’t an issue concerning just me. There was that college girl from before, and undoubtedly other girls who loved him just as much.
He was probably hesitant to tell me because he felt guilty about it.
He was likely feeling a sense of anxiety—or something similar—over his inability to give everyone an answer.
“I’m fine with whenever, you know,” I reassured him.
“But…”
“Because I’d much rather wait than have you force an answer and tell me you’re quitting the bar, or that we can’t see each other anymore. At least, that’s how I feel.”
My true, unadulterated feelings.
I pulled away from Masato slightly, straightening my posture.
“I don’t know about the other girls, but for me, if it’s not you, Masato, I absolutely don’t want it. Besides, I’m an old lady now, so you don’t have to walk on eggshells around me.”
Because Masato is so kind, he’s probably agonizing over the other girls’ futures. Worrying that if he strings those younger girls along for too long, they won’t be able to move on to their next romance… something like that.
But that doesn’t matter to me. I have absolutely no intention of ever falling in love with anyone but Masato.
“In what world are you an old lady…? You’re so beautiful.”
“My, aren’t you a sweet talker.”
Masato always knows exactly what to say to make me happy. It’s the whole reason I work so hard every day—just to hear him call me beautiful.
I took a sip of the wine poured into my glass. Its mellow aroma tickled my nose.
“From where I’m standing, the current situation is actually quite convenient for me.”
As I spoke, I thought about it a little. What would happen if Masato told me I could never see him again? Just the thought of it terrified me; I absolutely refused to return to how my life used to be.
Regardless, right now, Masato was my number one priority.
I wrapped both of my hands gently around Masato’s left hand as he sat beside me.
I did it with the hope that it might ease his worries, even just a little.
“Well, that’s how it is… so you’re free to do whatever you want with me.”
When I stared straight into his eyes, Masato’s face flushed even redder. Averting his gaze, he replied.
“…Thank you very much.”
He offered a bashful, embarrassed smile.
Because that smile looked just a tiny bit like his usual self, I couldn’t help myself.
“You’re just too cute.”
“Hey, please don’t treat me like a child!?”
As I patted Masato gently on the head…
I felt a small wave of relief wash over me.